So here I am updating my blog again . Revising ..for my papers tomorrow. And also waiting for my sis from work. I dont know if this is a good.idea, cause.most prolly...she will be home midnight. And my papers are like 8 in the morning.

Nvm. Sacrifice. So... Hopefully I wil" get the marks I want. Caramel frappe are my favs. Especially.statbucks . Hmm. Yums.

You might think I wont know .. But my feelings are mostly true. my feelings can feel the truth while u are lying. Please. Just stop all of these dramas. I dont really mind if you really like him. Like cmon, I dont waste my time on him. I dont really love him. Its just a crush. I cant even imagine myself being with him . Its fading .. My feelings towards him is fading. U can have him all to urself. Cause real man cant be stolen. And my mum taught me to give away old toys to someone less fortunate. Sometimes I do feel that u are nowhere near my ideal friend. Friends dont lie to each other. =.= its sooooo immature. Psh. Thinking all of this stuffs just making me feel that you are just a two face @$&_: . Im sorry but this is how I feel towards you. Dont bother coming near me. I wont entertain such person.

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So today will be my Sister first day at work. and here iam still with my laptop .
tomorrow will be MT paper .. for MY MAJOR EXAM . yes i retaking it.
hmm i guess that .. i can get an A1 .
i am lacking of motivation .. i just hit a nail on its head. MOTIVATION.
no one seems to motivate me anymore .
there is nothing to keep me moving forward.. all i get is just stress. People keep on pressurizing me to do better. only tell the bad side of everything . the negative side i would say. People all around me teaches me to be pessimistic. Never in my life i see someone so Positive. I wish i had one friend which is Positive thinking. so they can help me to be one too. i need my own initiative .. to do it . to be Positive, its hard. it will be easier if actions is easier than words.

So today have been quite a tiring day for me .
wore heels for the first time, and i am not regretting preferring sneakers over heels .
Heels are just making me feel more pain.. seriously.
its nice on me though but nah , i`ll pass , cause i don`t wanna look good if i feel pain. seriously . it won`t bring us any good.
looking for a job is so hard. even tough that i already have one .. which is at LIDO Imax. hmm .maybe in life u cant get waht u want huh ?
u have to work hard for it , to achieve what we really want .
so i just had my dinner. Umm yum yum.
while listening to music .. here i am updating ..
actualy , everytime i hear music .. alot of things is running through my mind.
im always thinking of something ...
reoccuring all the memories.
i always re read our old conversations.
i miss you all that . i Miss having someone where i can talk about everything.
being random at times.
i guess people wont know how i really felt.
i wanna scream it all out .. but something is blocking it.
there is some boundaries , a invisible wall covering all of scream .
where people wont be able listen.
Inside have been wanting to break free , I guess i dont really know.
i wanna feel freedom. I wanna Be who i really am.
but there are always things happened which i felt make me went back inside my
shell.
i dont know ? Thats just how i feel.
When i want to say something .. i just dont know how to elaborate it more . making people feeling hang. Or isit just me ? Feeling so paranoid.
i need to let loose. Of everything .
may my future of my life will be better, that is what i only wish for.

Hey ,
okay , sometimes i feel not to trusts you .
i don`t know why but my feeling felt that way.
my mind and heart is working together now . Weird ?
usually my heart and mind wont work together as they both have different perspective towards a particular problem . Hmm .
i guess i just have to sit back and let it all low. Like how you acted in front of me every time . its just adding more clues to what i am suspecting.
I hope i wont make the wrong choice. oh and i am really sorry if i don`t trusts you like how i used to.. i guess things change. Sometimes things changed for a reason,
well my reason ? let just keep it to myself, one thing for sure its not about how i am felling towards boys and all stuffs . i just noticed something in you which i really think that all you want is just attention ? hmm . maybe what i am facing now is just a wrong conclusions, i really really really Don`t know. i may be wrong , but for what i see now... i am still sticking to my opinion, unless you told me otherwise , explain everything, I may be paranoid though. who would`nt be right ?
everyone dosen`t want to get hurt over and over again they really feel that they might get tricked and lied to . Hell ? Yeah , let me just say .. since i know you .. you are making my life as living in hell. i am sorry.

Okay , so O level is ending.
i cant wait, wanna get myself into Long boarding,
hehe. cant wait, :D <3
okay so ... my life now is just revolving around alot of dramas,
i hate it so much . but sometimes life without dramas will be very boring .
maybe .. this is just what life is about.
all the backstabbing. which friends make to each other,
nice in the front ..in our backs ? they are someone you never know, or maybe we are just blind by the lies they made ?
sometimes all of these questions are just making us doubt ourselves.
hmm , i don`t know . maybe i am that weak ? in this kid of life stuffs.
sometimes i just need someone to tell me what is right and wrong ?
doing the right things sometimes make us feel wrong. Life is so contradicting.
i juts scared of what lies at my future.
i am afraid that my future wont be as something i want.
hmmm. scared that i wont be someone that i have always wanted .
life is the script that we write ourselves. its how we want it to be .
but .. i don`t know what really am good at. what i love ..im still searching what i am really is.
my fantasies kept me moving on.
ALL those dreams i dreamt is juts telling me something.. but i don`t know what is trying to tell me.
i still learning to love myself, i guess i love myself more than i used to be. that is a good thing that had happened in my life. I have wonderful friends behind me.
But some are just to .. i cant explain. they just trying to sow me something. I dot know.. are they trying to show me their true colors ? their true self ? I may never know. What must i do ? oh well .of what i am doing right now ? it is just GO WITH THE FLOW ~

HYA :D
okays so today , sunday 6.38pm
HHAHHA ! . went to malaysia at ard 6 am ?
yeahh , we went there to have our breakfast plus , paying our johore house
bills . hehe :D . I kinda miss my jhr house right now . HAIST :(
okay watevs , so after that , went home ard 11am ?
yeahh . so , ard 12 ? went out again .. went to Hougang mall . mom made
a dentist appointment .
after had her dentist appointment , we went to have our lunch at ZAM ZAM :D <3
OMG ! I LOVE THAT PLACE <3 <3 <3 <3
i ate briyani rice . WEEEEEE~ HAPPPPYYY !!~
so YAHHH ! this one man , the waiter accidentaly hit the cup filled with coffee ,
and it fell on that guy , and he MADE A REALLYY BIG FUSS !
the waiter said sorry , and he told every waiter in that room that he never even say sorrryyy !! AS IF HE IS A FREAKING VIP . Tahhh ~ and he say if he could buy another shirt for him , LIKE CMON ~ ur shirt is not even that expensive , i bet he bought it at any night market :O BOOOO ~ (N) .
his bag is not even branded !
and he told everyone ... EVERYONE ! ~~



GISH I JUST WISH THAT WAITER REALLLY PUSH HIM REAL HARD !
Fyi , the wiater size is like 3 times of him .
URGH ! ad the waiter is MUCH MORE GOOOD LOOKING THAN HIM !
and that stupid man daughter is such a brat . hahaha !
she weas jeweleries as if she is and adult . SERIOUSLY ? REALLY ?
im much more older than her but she wears more jeweleries than me.
WHAAAT ? HAHHA
okay , shall stop talking about them , i bet i can literally
go crazyy remmber what had happened , PSSSSHHH ~
so yeah .
WATCHING TRANSFORMERS TMRW :D <3 ..
YEAAYYYY ! EXCITED :D
going to watch it with Fudge , chocolate , Tiramisu and me :D
AAHHH . PHYSCED . V(^o^)v
SO TILL HERE :D
TODDLES :D






look out for my next update :D .
(^_^)v

HELLOOO !
so yeah , here i am again . Saturday today . 718pm.
AHMAD JUST GAVE ME VANS SHOE FOR MY BIRTHDAY PRESENT .
DAMN HAPPPPPYY :DDDD
if only DD , is still with me now , ):
i bet i let him know how happpyy i am and he will understand ):
i miss all those times ):
just hoping he will come back :D .
in a meantime , imma gona concentrate on my studies . NO REGRET !
so yeah , today went to town with my new kicks :D . HEHE .
i simply lovvvee it :D . its in dark blue tho :D .
HAHA. so yeah , went to takka , ion , wheelock , isetan :D .
HAHA . such a wonderful place :) .
so after town , went to the neighbourhood mall at lot one .
MET PAPA there , had some drinks at mac cafe :D .
DOUBLE CHOC FRAPPE :D YUM YYUUUMM . ( in love with this )
saw Daryll :)
HE SO CUTE NOW :D
LOL . okay watevs ,
took bus and head home .
SAW THIS VERYY GOODLOOKING BOYY ! OMG .
MELTS :D he stand beside me ?? AHHHHH~~~
happygirl94 .
okay . well , conclusion : SUCH A FUN DAY :D
GOING MALAYSIA TMRW ! WEEE~
so yeah till here :D . wann pray :D . BYESS ~ :D